One Man’s Quest to Embrace a Go-Giver Mindset

Recently at a local Chamber Business After Hours event, I met Andy Inhelder who is a Mortgage Broker with Aslan Home Lending Corporation. Filled with a big smile along with a positive, energetic vibe, Andy and I immediately struck a cord around our mutual interest in self-growth books. 

In ensuing weeks at an informal morning gathering I host at a local Denver coffee house every Friday, Andy was asked whether there was one book he could point to that has had a profound impact on his life. Without hesitation, he mentioned “The Go-Giver, (Expanded Edition): A Little Story about a Powerful Business Idea by Bob Burg and John David Mann. 

We’ve often heard that the secret to success is giving. Admittedly there was a period of my life where I threw shade on this notion feeling that all of my giving was never reciprocated. That is until a friend reminded me that “giving is giving and receiving is receiving.” In other words, if my intention behind giving was tied to some sort of highly targeted expectation, I would frequently be disappointed. 

Embracing Andy’s recommendation I finished listening to the audio version of the book last week and must say that it didn’t disappoint. Among the things I loved about it is how it dispelled the belief that “Go-Getters” are the ones who are most likely to achieve success. Rather, the authors assert that success is largely predicated on giving —- a message that’s explored through a set of core principles contained in the book. 

The book introduces you to a fictionalized story about an ambitious man named Joe who is chomping at the bit for success. He is the quintessential “go-getter” who often feels that the greater the effort he puts into achieving his aims, the more they elude him. Desperate to land a game-changing sale at the end of a bad quarter he was experiencing, Joe, seeks advice from a gentleman by the name of Pindar, a highly respected advisor, and consultant who due to his top-notch reputation is often referred to as the Chairman. 

Over time, Pindar connects Joe with a series of “go-givers”: a restaurateur, a CEO, a financial adviser, a real estate broker, and the "Connector,” the latter being the common thread that brought them all together. Pindar's friends teach Joe the Five Laws of Stratospheric Success which helps to expose him to the power of giving. Through these experiences, Joe discovers how shifting his focus from getting to giving — placing others’ interests first and continually adding value to their lives — is the key to yielding unexpected returns. 

Delivered with compassion and grace, The Go-Giver brings to life the old proverb "give and you shall receive." Since its original publication over a decade ago, the term "go-giver" has become synonymous with true success among scores of thousands of people throughout the world. The expanded edition of the book in addition to the original text contains a discussion guide along with a valuable Q&A section from the author. 

Now back to Andy, who introduced me to the book. He says that one of his biggest takeaways from it was that being a go-giver also involves staying open to receiving. As author Bob Burg writes:

“Whether it’s gratefully accepting advice or enthusiastically following your curiosity (and asking questions along the way), one way to tell if you’ve got a go-giver culture on your team is to take a look at how gracefully you receive.” 

Andy says that his journey in the mortgage world began with several stints in banking back in 1999:

“I was doing second mortgages back then for brokers and evolved over the past 20 plus years into having my own company with my Dad from 2002-08.  Then the mortgage industry collapse happened. So from roughly 2009-2017, I worked for several regional banks doing mortgages.”

He says that it was in 2017 when he went to work for Cherry Creek Mortgage that he was first exposed to The Go-Giver Book. 

“They have some very good philosophies there at Cherry Creek Mortgage, especially Jeff May, president and CEO of that company. I really like Jeff as a person. And so he gave me a copy of it.” 

There was a minor hitch though says Andy: 

“I am the world’s slowest reader. Even during my last year of college I never bought textbooks because I never read them. So I found the book on audio and listened to it, albeit half-heartedly.” 

He says it wasn’t until 2019 when he met Carrie Gusmus, President and CEO at Aslan Home Lending that he began to fully embrace the book’s philosophy. As he recounts: 

“We started talking and she said, ‘you need to re-read the Go-Giver.’ That really struck a chord with me.  As we started having conversations about me coming to work for her, the first time I walked into the office, there was a copy of the Go Giver on the coffee table in the office. I was like ‘wow, there it is again.’ So that next weekend I read it again and became hooked.” 

He says that his brother at the time was making a career change due to the COVID disruption and had gotten laid off. So he gave him a copy of it and made him promise to read it. “The book significantly impacted him as well.” 

When I asked Andy about the overriding message in terms of what he received from the book, he had this to say: 

“To me, it is all about how I can help other people grow their business first and foremost. In other words, who can I introduce them to, what can I do to help them be successful in their own business first and foremost. But to me the second most important rule of the book is that you as an individual have to be open to receiving a gift from other people as well. Because I feel like in today’s society so many people are willing to help others all time, but they are not willing to be open to receiving a gift in return.” 

Reflecting back, he says that because others have always referred to him as a “Go-Getter,” for the longest time after having read the book he was under the mistaken belief that you couldn’t be a “Go-Getter” and “Go-Giver” simultaneously. 

‘I’ve since learned through talking with Carrie as well as another buddy of mine that you can be a Go-Getter and Go-Giver in helping others achieve their goals and their aspirations.” 

Nevertheless, there are those who, given their circumstance, are under the mistaken belief that they have nothing to give. Asked about this, Andy had this to offer: 

“There is always a way to give irrespective of where we are in life. Even if you can spend 15-20 minutes hearing someone out who’s going through a tough time, that’s giving. The same with a person who may be looking for a plumber or a car repair person and you can offer them some suggestions. And the next thing you know, you’ve planted a seed that comes back to you two-fold or three-fold.” 

For those contemplating reading “The Go-Giver,” Andy shares a brief tale of his own experience in navigating through the book 

“The first time I read it, it took me two weeks to read it because I’m the world’s slowest reader. That’s why I prefer audiobooks — I love hearing the message because I’m such an auditory learner. I enjoy being able to back the audio recording up and listen to a point over and over again, instead of just flipping pages. And hearing the inflection of the narrator's voice.”

Andy adds that he is always seeking that next great book that he can pigtail off of and enlighten his knowledge.  The broader significance of books in his life, he says, stems from his mother, who was an educator who always tried to force him to read growing up. He concludes with this thought: 

‘We didn’t really have good audio versions back then. But now as a parent to my three girls, I’m always sending them audio and video clips related to various books which spark great conversations over family dinners which we still have six days a week. This is just one way for me to give forward to them as their father.”