The Tragedy of Addiction: An Author's Sobering Account Of His Grandson
By Kris Wood, Guest Contributing Writer
Last summer, I had the opportunity to catch up with my cousin, Laurie, on a family camping trip. One afternoon while chatting she told me about a book she had just read called, “Leave Out the Tragic Parts: A Grandfather’s Search for a Boy Lost to Addiction” by acclaimed sports writer/journalist Dave Kindred.
Laurie shared how the story of the grandfather and grandson’s journey in this book had so touched her. As a result, she often reflected back on the passages.
Captured by her description and impressions of this story I was moved to place it on my Goodreads “To Read” list. But then something unexpected happened. About a week later she reached out to let me know that she had purchased and sent me a copy. At this point, it became obvious to me that the memoir had really made an impact on her, one that she wanted others to experience.
Upon reading it, I was struck by the book’s easy-going style, one that draws the reader in and keeps you there. In Kindred’s telling of the story of his grandson Jared, aka Goblin, you are immediately captivated by the vulnerability of each family member presented in the story.
The author’s role in Jared’s life is heartfelt, sad, and humorous. The acknowledgment of moments of regret or missteps taken, allows us to feel the humanity, compassion, and courage necessary to share Jared/Goblin’s life story.
Personally, I was hooked after reading the introduction:
“This is a story about a boy I knew from the week of his birth and a young man I never knew at all. The boy was my grandson, Jared Glenn Kindred, and the young man was Goblin. That was Jared’s road name, Goblin. He lived on the street until he learned to hop freight trains and then he lived on the road.”
“He was one of those wanderers whose lives are a mystery and bafflement, an undoable jigsaw puzzle. To find the light in that darkness, the storyteller goes in search of those who knew Jared who became Goblin. The storyteller who is also the grandfather then writes it truly. He writes it with tears and compassion and laughter.”
The unconventional life of Jared Kindred debuts in a very conventional way — a loving nuclear and extended family, a twin brother, and early childhood years that were full of family gatherings, bike rides along the neighborhood streets, and regular trips to the local candy store and fire station. After a move, a divorce, his father’s re-marriage, and subsequent separation of the twins, signs of imbalance arise.
In a discussion later in life, Jacob, Jared’s twin, acknowledged that alcohol became part of their life by age 13. At 15, Jared shares how he told his mom he was an alcoholic. Problem was, at such a young age, no one believed this “attention-getting” story.
While both boys graduated high school, Jared chose to wander off and live life on his own terms. Because he lived on the fly, wherever he was welcome, he became part of the homeless world.
He relished the freedom to get up and go whenever the mood struck him. Over time, he ended up traveling from one end of our country to the other. His cohorts, otherwise known as road dogs, were from diverse backgrounds.
Some chose this life (yes, some DO choose it). Others lived on the street because of tragedy and misfortune. A motley crew for sure but also a family of their own making.
It was during this early time away from home that he took on the name Goblin after spending time in New Orleans during Halloween. He hopped his first freight train at 22 and was hooked forever after. The ability to move around so much more quickly, albeit just as dangerously, appealed to his wanderlust.
Goblin’s nomadic ways expanded his connections, widening his “family” as Goblin attracted people with his engaging smile, kind disposition, and pure joyfulness. Despite living life on his own terms, people naturally felt protective of and supported by Goblin.
Remaining in touch with his biological family intermittently, his alcoholism and its lethal hold on Goblin became more and more apparent in the ensuing years. It’s here where I was struck by the juxtaposition between Jared’s life and engagement with his family to Goblin’s life on the road. In many ways this narrative reflects the many ways alcoholism splits a person’s mind, emotions, and intellect, skewing one’s neurological function and controlling one’s behaviors and needs.
There is no way to know how Jared’s life, given his love of travel and the open road, would have unfolded had he not become addicted to alcohol as a teenager. Fortunately, his grandfather wrote this memoir to share a perspective unknown to most and unthinkable to many.
In authoring this book, Kindred’s loving wish was to shine a light on this facet of our population. To put life in front of our eyes so that when we see others living as Goblin did, we don’t assume the worst, believing that their fate was deserved when misfortune visits them.
The story of Goblin’s life took his grandfather six years as he researched and contacted hundreds of people who knew and spent time with Goblin through the years. This memoir is a loving tribute to a remarkable young man whose sparkling blue eyes and easy smile made him everyone’s friend. Someone any one of us would be lucky to meet.
The tragedy is the way in which alcohol consumed him. Gratefully, Mr. Kindred did not “leave out the tragic parts” of Jared/Goblin’s story as it may help guide another to get the help she/he needs before it is too late.
“There is the friend who said, ‘You have to tell Jared’s story. You have to tell it for him and for yourself. Keep him alive in your heart. Tell his story for his parents, for Jacob, and for all the other kids out there like him. All your love and concern couldn’t save Jared, but you might just be able to save some of them traveling the same road. All those kids whose wiring and biochemistry make it impossible to accept the help they need. Tell Jared’s story.”
And so he did. Read this love story and behold the story of a boy lost to addiction…